Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Next Season on Survivor

Next Season on Survivor

Have you heard about the next planned "Survivor" show?

Three businessmen and three businesswomen will be dropped in a high school classroom for 1 school year. Each business person will be provided with a copy of his/her school district's curriculum, and 5 classes of 36 - 40 students.

Each class will have a minimum of eleven learning-disabled children, three with A.D.D., one gifted child, and four who speak limited English. Three students will be labeled with severe behavior problems. The remaining students will have an average GPA of 1.35.

Each business person must complete lesson plans at least 5 days in advance, with annotations for curriculum objectives and state frameworks... And then modify, organize, or create their materials in order to adjust for the legal accomodate of the eleven learning disabled students, the gifted student, and the four limited English students.

They will be required to teach students, handle misconduct, implement technology, document attendance, write referrals, correct homework, make bulletin boards, compute grades, complete report cards, document benchmarks, communicate with parents, and arrange parent conferences. They must also stand in their doorway between class changes to monitor the hallways.

In addition, they will complete fire drills, tornado drills, and [Code Red] drills for shooting attacks each month.

They must attend workshops, faculty meetings, and attend curriculum development meetings. They must also tutor students who are behind and strive to get their 2 non-English speaking children proficient enough to take the Stanford, Terra Nova, Diagnostics and MCAS tests. If they are sick or having a bad day they must not let it show.

Each day they must incorporate reading, writing, math, science, and social studies into the program. They must maintain discipline and provide an educationally stimulating environment to motivate students at all times. If all students do not wish to cooperate, work, or learn, the teacher will be held responsible.

The business people will only have access to the public golf course on the weekends, but with their new salary, they may not be able to afford it. There will be no access to vendors who want to take them out to lunch, and lunch will be limited to thirty minutes, which is not counted as part of their work day. The business people will be permitted to use a restroom, as long as another survival candidate can supervise their class.

If the copier is operable, they may make copies of necessary materials before, or after, school. However, they cannot surpass their monthly limit of copies. They most likely will have to spend $100 per month out of their own pocket to pay for supplies and paper. The business people must continually advance their education, at their expense, and on their own time.

The winner of this Season of Survivor will be allowed to return to their job, the losers will continue for 3 years as teachers in their local school district.

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